THE VENUS VANGUARD
FIGHTING THE VIRAL DEMONS
VENUS'S VANGUARD
RING OF PROTECTION
IS WEAK IN THE BEGINNING
TO SWEEP OFF ONES FEET
SHIVERING SWEET ATTRACTIONS
TO THE TRAGEDIES OF THOSE
FRAGMENTED SOULS
THEY HELPED THE PLOT
TO MOTIVATE
BY THE CHASING OF THE SUN
AND MOON AROUND THE STAR
THE ELEMENTAL TATTOOS
SHIFT TO EACH TYPE OF VIRUS
EXPOSED AND THE DARKNESS
OF THE VOID
IS FEARS
FOR THE LACK OF UNDERSTANDING
IN THE WORLD
HER EYE PATCH
IS THE NATURAL BORN SIGHT
A CURSED DREADED BOND
UNBREAKABLE AND UNFORGETTABLE
BITS AND PIECES TO A LOST
ONE
OF THE ANCIENT NAMES
DAGGERS NOW TO THE
ONE THAT ONLY WANTED
PROTECTION
AS THE STAIRWAY
NARROWS ITS PATH
THE WALL TIL ITS SEEN
FULFILLED
DETERMINATION TO OVERCOME
AND PROTECT
SENT SHIVERS DOWN
MY SPINE
YET NEVER TRULY SAVING ANY
IN THE FINALITY OF IT ALL
NO LONGER THE LIGHT
THAT DRAWS THE THINGS
OUT TO THE BLINDED
SEARING PAIN
OF THOSE HEADACHES
OF THEN
AND NOW KNOWING WHY
AND WHAT THEY
REALLY BROUGHT
NO MORE MYSTERY OF THE ONE
THAT LIKED TO PLAY
THREW CHAOS OUR WAY
AND ONE THREW IT AWAY
WHILE THE OTHER TRAGEDICALLY
EXCEPTED ITS WAYS
AND YET ANOTHER
TRAPPED HERS FAR FAR AWAY
AND TOO CLOSE
BROUGHT ABOUT TO HARNESS
THE LIVING
A VIRUS WITHIN
TO OUTWARD SCARS
THE ANTIVIRAL SWITCH
TO WATCH THEM ATTACK
AND NOT ABLE TO DO A DAMN THING
WAVE OF ATTACK AFTER ATTACK
TO THE WRONGED SIDE OF THINGS
ALWAYS LEFT TO THE SADDENED HEART
SORRY OH SO SORRY
WITHIN THE DIAMONDS THAT
DON'T EXIST
GEMS OF THE CROSS THAT DO
AND TO WHAT END
TO BE ALL ELEMENTS AT ONCE
OR WITHIN A CHURCH OF SORTS
OR OUTSIDE OF IT
TO PROTECT TO OR FROM
WITH OR WITHOUT
THE DARK HAIRED
THE RED HAIRED
AND
THE GREY HAIRED
OH TO THE NEW REBORN
FAST LIGHTNING STRAIGHT
THROUGH HOPES
OF HOPE A ENEMY
OR HOPE A FRIEND
FIGURING OUT WHAT LOSSES
FILL OUT TO THE WAY
OF THE HIGHEST PRICE TO PAY
FIGURED IN THE WAY
OF THE BESERKER
AND NEVER GAVE IN TO ITS CALL
OH TO THE DAMNED
INDEPENDENCE WITHIN ME
OH TO THE FLIGHT
SOON WHEN THE TIME RAN OUT
AND THEN THE
ONE THING SHE LOVED THE MOST
NOW DARKNESS WITHOUT
THE STARS
ALL I WANT IS TO SEE
THE STARS AGAIN
THAT NEVER COME OUT
THE NIGHT CLOUDS COVERED THEM
NOW OFF AND ON THEY ARE SEEN IN ALL THEIR GLORY
WAS THIS DONE
BY MYSELF
OR SOMEONE ELSES DOING
ITS KNOWN ITS NOT OF ME
THAT I HAVE TO PAY FOR
A HUGE PRICE NOW FOR
I AM ALONE
AM I ALONE
TO BECOME SOMETHING I REFUSED
TO BECOME
WAS THAT RIGHT
OR WAS THAT WRONG
WHERE WILL THAT LEAD ME
UP OR DOWN
IS THERE A UP OR DOWN
LEFT OR RIGHT
OH TO THE GOOD
OH TO THE BLOODY EVIL I ABHOR
OH TO THE YOU
OH TO THE ME
OH TO THE US
AND TO THE THEM
LONG LONG LONG
TO THE I AND THEM
AND YOU AND THEM
AND WHAT FOLLOWED
AND WHAT CAUGHT UP TO US
AND WHY?
A CRUEL JOKE
AT THE HONEST ONES
SAKE
FOR A LOVE
FOR LOVE
ALWAYS FOR THE LOVE THAT IS DIM IN MY HEART
BUT STILL THERE
WANTING TO EXPRESS ITSELF
SOMEDAY AGAIN
WHY?
THE INCREASING DARKNESS
OH TO BREAK HER
IN THE MOMENTS THEY CALL
AND CAN'T BE RESISTED
NOT TO THE BREAKER
BUT TO THE ONE LEFT
BROKEN
WHERE IS THIS GOING
AM I IN LIMBO
AM I TO LIVE
AM I TO DIE
AM I JUST WAITING
WHY?
THE NIGHT
THE RAINING
SHOWER OF FALLING STARS
WHERE DID THEY GO
WILL THEY EVER
COME BACK
TO BE ONCE AGAIN
WITHIN THE SAME
AS BEFORE
THEY CAME BACK IN TIME
OR WILL THERE
EVER BE ANYMORE
FROM THE DARKNESS
BACK INTO THE LIGHT
TOTALLY
DRAWN TOGETHER
AS IF BY
A HIDDEN HAND
BEFORE THE VIRAL DEMONS
DESTROY ALL OF REALITY
WRITING AND FADING IN AND OUT
INTO A TRANCED STATE
THEN BACK AGAIN
THROUGH THE FLOWING
COLORFUL ENERGY
FROM TRAVELING THROUGH
ITS UNIVERSAL EXPANSE
SO ITS TIME
ALL IN THE TIME
REST THE AWOKEN
WISHED SHE COULD SLEEP
BUT REFUSED
THE HEART RETURNED
FOR TO FIND LOVE
AND LIVE LIFE TO WHAT
END
TO THE SOURCE
THE WHISPERED SOUNDS
OF THE FUTURE
UNKNOWN
IN THE SEPARATED LIVES
OF TRUTHS AND SO
OH SO MANY LIES
CAN YOU TELL ME
MORE THAN WHAT I KNOW
FOR WHAT I KNOW
SEEMS TO BE VERY LITTLE
IS THIS THE TRUTH
IS THIS WHAT IS REAL
OR WAS WHERE I WAS BEFORE REAL
AND THIS NOW MY CONTINUED
JOURNEY IN THE LAND
OF REALITY
TO THE HEAVENS
THROUGH THE REALMS
LEAVING BEHIND HELL
AND ALL THAT I TRIED TO SAVE
DID IT MEAN ANYTHING AT ALL
WAS THAT SACRIFICE REAL
SOMETHING SAYS ITS SO
DID IT TRULY BRING US BACK
AND I JUST GET STUCK
OR ARE WE ALL SLEEPING
AND THE WALKING AROUND
IN SOME KIND OF SPIRITUAL ZOMBIELAND
OH TO MY LUCID WAYS
WONDERING AND NOT SAYING
CAUSE WE DON'T WANT TO SEE
WHAT IS HAPPENING
OR ALREADY HAPPENED
CAN I LET THEM GO
WILL THEY DESTROY ME
OR HELP ME
BETWEEN THEIR TRUTHS
AND LIES
AND WHERE I WISHED TO BE
AND WHERE I AM
AND WHERE I WAS
AND WHERE WILL I BE
DETERMINED
TO BE
YET GIVEN LITTLE
TO THIS
TOTAL UNFORSEEN SPOT
OF A CURSE
OR A BLESSING
WHICH IS IT
SOMETIMES ITS BOTH
TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED
AND ALL THINK I AM NUTS
OR TO WALK THAT
FINE LINE
MY SOUL IS INTACT
I DIDN'T LOSE IT
I FOUGHT FOR IT
MASSIVELY FOUGHT FOR IT
SO WAS IT ALL IN MY HEAD
OR WAS IT REAL
DO I KNOW
WILL I KNOW
AM I ALONE
OR WILL I EVER KNOW
THE TRUTH
LEARNING NOW THAT
I AM NOT ALONE
JUST ONE THAT REMEMBERED
WHILE OTHERS FORGOT
OF THE WHY
I HEARD
WHY I LOVED
AND WHY I ALLOWED
FOR NOW
AM I LIKE THE OTHERS
IN THE MUSIC
OR AM I ALONE IN THIS
IN THAT I FEEL SO
EMERGING AND YET
THE RISE IS A LONG WAITING SLOW GRIND FOR
THE TRUE ROSE
OF A PAST
TO THE PRESENT
OF THIS LOSS
IN BETWEEN THE BLACK AND SILVER
OF TECHNICOLORS
AND ALL THE GREYS
I SHIFT IN AND OUT TOWARDS
MY FUTURE
DO I GET TO BE
WITH ETERNALLY
ONE DAY
I FEEL THAT SO BINDING IN A CLOSE PEACEFUL WALK THAT MAKES ME SMILE
OR STUCK HERE
FOR ETERNITY
IN THAT COLD DARK GROUND
I DON'T LOOK TO THAT
I SEEK TO REMAIN
IN THE WONDEROUS
ENERGY OF THAT REALM VISIONARY
WITH A CHARGED LIFE
AND WHAT WILL HAPPEN
NOW
I WANT IT TO BE
A LONG LONG TIME FROM NOW
THAT SIX FOOT HOLLOW
SHALLOW GROUND
DO I GET THAT WISH
WHEN WHAT I WAS IN
AND WHAT I AM IN
AND WHERE I WILL BE
ARE THEY ALL
THATS LEFT
THAT TRUTH
CARRIES ME OVER
INTO THE BEAUTY ALL AROUND ME
IN AND OUT
OF THE SILENCE
CAN ANYONE TELL ME
OR AM I
JUST ALONE
CAUSE IF I SAY ANYTHING
I WILL BE MARKED AGAIN
AND NO MORE HITS
DO I WANT TO CALL
ATTENTION TO THIS SOUL
JUST WANT TO LIVE AND LET LIVE
WHICH I KNOW I AM NOT
ALWAYS ALLOWED
LIKE THE BOLT
SCREWED IN OR SCREWED OUT
THE QUESTION REMAINS
FROM ALL OF HISTORY
TO ALL OF WHAT IS TO COME
FOR I KNOWLEDGE OF WHATS LONGER
HAVING NO
BLOODY CLUE
TO THE FINAL OUTCOME
I WANT TO PRAY
AND SAY YOU WILL COME
AND GET ME
YET I KNOW BETTER NOW
WHEN THAT DAY COMES
WHICH I NOW DREAD
THAT I WON'T BE ALONE IN
OR JUST BLACK TO A WHITE NOTHINGNESS
BUT DO I REALLY KNOW
WAS THIS MY ONLY
CHANCE AT GETTING UPTHERE
AND STAYING IN BLISS
OR WAS THAT REALLY INBETWEEN
SO MANY LEFT UNANSWERED
QUESTIONS
OF WHERE I CAN VISIT NOW AND WHERE I WILL NEVER BE
ABLE TO VISIT AGAIN
AND NO WAY TO EXPRESS IT
BUT WITHIN MYSELF
HERE ON A WALL
THAT NO ONE ELSE
SEEMS TO CARE TO SEE
YET
. . .
SIGH
OH TO THE NIGHTTIME
AND THE
VENUS'S VANGUARD
WHERE MY DAY IS MY TIME
AND THE NIGHT
JUST IS HERE NOW.
AFTER MIDNIGHT THE SILENCE OF MY SURROUNDINGS
IS SO PEACEFUL
YET WE DO GO ON
IN WHAT WAYS WE CAN
OH HOW I ONCE LOVED
THE NIGHT AS MUCH AS THE DAY
AND NOW I JUST
DON'T KNOW
WHAT IS WHAT
ANYMORE
BUT I KNOW I AM ALIVE
I BLEED
I HAVE PAIN
I ACHE
I CRY
I FEEL
I AM ALIVE
THAT MEANS SOMETHING
DOES IT NOT
AND HOW I WANT
TO STAY ALIVE
AS LONG AS I CAN
I KNOW MY PURPOSE
CAN'T BE OVER
FOR IT WAS BROUGHT BACK
IN A MOMENT ALL PASSED
FOR A REASON
NOW WHAT THAT REASON
IS
IS YET TO BE KNOWN
BUT I AM DOING
WHAT I LOVE TO DO
WHAT MEANS THE MOST
AND WHAT I CAN
WITHIN THIS BOTTOMED
LEVEL OF MUCK
THAT I WISH I COULD ESCAPE FROM
TO THE LIFE OF WHAT
IS SEE AROUND ME
AND MAKING THE BEST OF THIS MIRE
WHILE I CAN
FOR EACH PRECIOUS MOMENT
IS NOW CHERISHED
IN THE TIME THAT SLIPS AWAY LIKE GRAINS OF SAND
TODAY A FRIEND I KNOW
TALKED OF A LUXURY
I CAN ONLY FOREVER DREAM OF
TO GO AND SIT IN A SAUNA
THEN GET A MASSAGE
THEN DRINK TEA
THEN GO BACK AT ANOTHER TIME
FOR HE PAYS 60 A MONTH
TO DO THIS
HELL THAT 60 A MONTH
RIGHT NOW
IS SOMETHING I JUST DON'T HAVE
AND TO THINK
THE MUCK IS WHERE I AM STUCK
JUST TOTALLY FUCKING
SUCKS
YET I WILL FORM SOME KIND OF WAY OUT EVEN IF ITS
A TEMPORARY HIGH
AND HAPPINESS OF THAT
EUPHORIA
OF DOING WHAT I CAN
WITHIN THE GRASPS OF
WHAT OTHERS ALLOW
VOLUNTEERING
IS NOT A UNGRATIFYING REWARD
ITS FULL OF PLEASURE
OF THAT KNOWING
YOU ARE DOING SOME GOOD
IN THE SMALL FOOTPRINT
OF OUR WORLD
SO TO THAT GOAL
OF GETTING AT LEAST ONE STEP
UP OUT OF THE MIRE
WILL I WALK THIS
ITS THE CRAWL BEFORE YOU WALK
THE WALK BEFORE YOU RUN
THE RUN BEFORE THE WHEELS
THE WHEELS BEFORE THE HOME
ITS A PROCESS
BIT BY BIT
MOMENT BY MOMENT
AND THE SOUNDS THAT SURROUND
LIKE BIRDS SING IN THE MORNING
AT THE GATES TO THE BUS
SACRED TOTALLY
BEYOND ANYTHING
I CAN'T EVEN SEE A TV SHOW
I CAN'T WATCH A MOVIE
I DON'T GET TO PLAY A GAME
I USED TO
THINGS I LOVED TO DO
CUS STUFF HAS BROKEN
AND I CAN'T GET A WAY TO FIX IT
JUST CAUSE I AM THERE
OH TO THE VIRAL DEMONS
JUST LET ME BE
AND THAT IS LOVE
ISN'T A BLOODY CRIME
ITS THE MISLED AND
DESTRUCTION OF MY HEART
THAT IS THE CRIME
IT DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT TO ME
NOT ONE DAMN BIT
THAT NO MATTER WHAT I DO
EVERYONE LOOKS AT MY STUFF
LIKE MY STICKS SAYS
DAMN THATS GOOD
THEY LOOK AT IT
ADMIRE IT
AND GO ON...
AND YET HERE I AM
STILL DETERMINED
TO CHANGE THIS DAMN
STATE OF MIRED AFFAIRS
THAT SEEMS TO LEAD
ME INTO NOTHING
SOMEDAYS ITS
LIKE THE RAIN
YET OTHERS
ITS A WONDERFUL HAPPINESS IN THAT MOMENT
I AM APPRECIATED
HAVE I BECOME
THE LADY OF SORROW
THE LADY OF COMPASSION
FOR A WORLD THAT HAS NONE
LIKE KWAN YIN
TO POUR THE LIVING WATERS
OUT TO THE WORLD
THE GLOW OF SPREADING
WHAT I CAN SHINE
EVEN IF ITS IN A SMALL WAY
TO LEAVE ONE
BEHIND AND GATHER MORE
TO THE MANTRAS
THAT ONCE GOVERNED
TO THE EMPTYINESS
AND THE PEACE
THAT I CAN KEEP GOING ON
EVEN IF I RARELY
SEE MY OWN FLESH AND BLOOD
FOR IT ALL
SEPARATED US SO DEEPLY
WHEN WE WERE SO CONNECTED
WILL I EVER BE FREE
FOR DOING THE DAMN RIGHT THING
CAUSE I DIDN'T WANT
I GET PUNISHED FOR
NEVER LETTING ANOTHER SOUL
HURT ME OR HER
AGAIN
WHY AM I PUNISHED ALWAYS
WE BOTH GET DONE WRONG
IT ISN'T RIGHT
I AM SORRY FOR TRYING AGAIN
BUT MY HEART CALLED OUT
IT WAS IN NEED
AND SO MUCH NEED
AND IT JUST ACHES
THE SACRIFICES I MADE
I WILL NEVER MAKE AGAIN
JUST TO SURVIVE
IN THAT I AM NOT ALONE
THAT IS APART OF WHAT
CARRIES ME THROUGH
KNOWING
SHE STILL CARES
JUST LIFE CARRIES HER
IN ANOTHER DIRECTION FROM ME
NOW HAVING GIVEN
HALF MY LIFE TO THE GOAL OF RAISING HER SHE IS ON HER OWN
AND I CAN HAVE A SEPARATE LIFE YET >>>
SOMEWHERE
SOMEHOW
SOMEDAY
I WILL FIND SOMETHING TO KEEP THIS MEMORY FROM DRAGGING ME DOWN
AND I WON'T LOOK BACK
AND I HAVE BEEN OUT
HERE FOR SO DAMN LONG
TRYING TO MAKE IT WORK
AND KEEP MY HEAD ABOVE THE WATER
EVEN IF I AM WAIST DEEP
I AM STILL TRYING
CAUSE I DON'T KNOW ANY OTHER WAY TO BE
NO ONE KNOWS
HOW MUCH THIS SILENCE SUCKS
ESPECIALLY FOR AN AQUARIAN
THAT NEEDS PEOPLE
AROUND HER TO KEEP HER
CONTENT
SO OUT THE DOOR I GO
AND FIND THAT SPOT
AND CONNECT TO THE PEOPLE FORCING
THE CHANGE
SO THAT GROWTH CONTINUES
IN ME AND MY SURROUNDINGS
I DO MY BEST
BUT THE CHOICES GIVEN
ARE NOT CHOICES
THEY SO FAR ARE JUST
DEAD ENDS
YET I MAKE THE MOST
OF THOSE DEAD ENDS
IN THE MOMENT WHILE THEY ARE PRESENT
TO HOPE THEY REACH ME TO A STEPPING STONED GOAL RATHER THAN JUST
MAKE MY HEART SCREAM
I WANT THE
END TO LEAD UP
NOT DOWN INTO A GRAVE
BEFORE MY TIME
SO I KEEP FIGHTING
AND I KEEP DOING WHAT I CAN
IN HOPE
TO FIND SOMETHING BETTER
OR EVEN HALF WAY TO WHERE I WAS
BEFORE IT ALL FELL APART
YEARS AGO
AND NONE OF THAT
WAS MY FAULT
OUTSIDE FORCES OR NOT
IT ALWAYS TAKES
AND GIVES SO LITTLE IN RETURN
MOST OF THE TIME
YET I RISE
STEP BY STEP
TOWARDS SOME DIRECTION
I CAN HANDLE THAT
IN TO ENJOY A SIMPLE EVENT
AND YOU HAVE A FRIEND TO RELY ON
FEELS GOOD KNOWING
THERE IS GIVE AND TAKE
AND NOT JUST TAKE
TRUE FRIENDS
AND NOT ONESIDEDNESS
THAT KNOWS YOU CAN NEVER
PAY THEM BACK
AND YET NEVER ASK A THING
ITS THE JOYS OF
JUST BEING THAT COUNT
KNOWING YOU WILL NEVER
GET TO EVEN LOOK
TO SEE WHAT IS THERE
JUST TO KEEP YOUR SANITY
FOR ALL YOU LOVE TO DO
IS CREATE
SO TO THE VENUS'S VANGUARD
THAT RULES THIS HEART
TELL ME WHY
I DECIDED AT FIVE
THAT ART WAS MY PATH
AND IT NEVER ALTERED
BECAUSE I SAW A PATH THAT CREATNG WAS LOVE
AND SO THAT IS WHY...
I CREATE
I CARE
I LOVE
NOW I DON'T GIVE
A DAMN
FOR THE WHY?
SO MUCH AS FOR
THE OH BLOODY
HELL WHY NOT?
AND MAKE THE BEST
OF IT
AS IT IS
WHAT COMES WILL COME
WHAT WON'T IS NOT MY LOSS
BUT THEIR'S
SO TO THE TREK
OF THIS JOURNEY
I CHERISH
LIFE
LIVING IT AS IT IS...
