WINDOW SEAT

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO OR NOT DO I SIT HERE AND PAINT/DRAW MY LIFE AWAY WORKING ON THE THREE THINGS MIND, BODY, AND SOUL IN THAT LIMBO STATE WHERE ALWAYS OUT OF GRASP WITH BUT WITHOUT IN ALL THIS MY HEART IS SO HEAVY WHEN I LOOK AT NEWS BUT SO LIGHT WHEN I LISTEN TO MUSIC AND WASH IT AWAY CARRYING ON IN THIS AS I CAN BUILDING BLOCKS AND WALLS AGAIN YET NO MATTER WHAT THERE IS ONLY TIME WHEN ALL THAT IS ON MY MIND IS A FOREVER YESTERDAY EMOTION THAT RESTS IN THE HEART DEEP DOWN SOMEWHERE AND ON THE OUTSIDE IS SO COLD AS ICE WILLING FOR IT TO BE BROKEN YET STILL I CAN'T EVER LET MY GUARD DOWN YET SOME DAYS I DO SOME DAYS I SAY FUCK IT AND JUST GO ON OTHERS I AM CRAVING THAT WHICH JUST ISN'T BUT IS ALWAYS POSSIBLE YET I NEVER KNOW HOW OR WHEN IF EVER THAT DAY MAY COME TO HAVE AND HOLD IN SWEETNESS AGAIN SO LONG SO MANY LIES NO IDEA WHICH WAY TO GO OR BE I STAY IN THE HERE AND NOW WITH WHAT I HAVE AROUND ME AND ALL ENERGY GOES TO STAYING HERE THERE ARE GOOD DAYS AND BAD DAYS SMILES AND MANY NO SMILES MY HANDS ARE LIKE FIRE THEY ALWAYS CALL AND REACH FOR THE HAND OF ANOTHER YET ALWAYS OUT OF REACH SITUATIONS MAKE IT SO MUCH HARDER THAN IT HAS TO BE YET I NEVER GIVE UP TRYING TO FIND WAYS YET ITS FRET FOR NOT MOST OF THE TIME CHOICES WE MAKE AND THOSE WE HAVE NO CHOICE IN MADE FOR US SINGING MY HEART OUT TO SONGS I ENJOY LEAVES ON NO ONE ELSES EARS BUT MINE IN MY CREATIVE SPACE ALWAYS WHERE I AM AND YET NEVER WHERE I SO WISH TO BE LOST IN THIS ON THIS SIDE OF THINGS I STAY YET IN EVERYTHING I FLOW IN AND OUT OF KNOW I AM STILL HERE WE ARE WHO WE ARE NO MATTER WHAT IS SAID AND DONE TO ERASE US WE ARE PEOPLE HUMANS WITH A LIFE AND A SOUL AND WE ARE TOTALLY NOT TO BE MADE NONEXISTANT CUS SOMEONE ELSES POINT OF VIEW SAYS WE JUST CANT BE WHO WE ARE WRONG SO WRONG I HAVE NO ISSUES WITH MY VIEWS ON THE RAINBOW AND RIDE THAT GATE BACK AND FORTH FOR I AM WHO I AM WHO I WAS BORN AS AND WHO I AM NOW I HAVE NEVER CHANGED AND I NEVER WILL WE ALL HAVE A RIGHT TO HAVE A VOICE TO BE LOVED AND LOVE AND SHARE OUR SELVES TO THE WORLD ACCEPTED OR NOT AS LONG AS I AM WHO I AM AND KNOW THAT AND RESPECTED AND CHERISHED AND LOVED BY THOSE THAT SEE PAST A LABEL THEN I AM FINE AND WILL STAY IN MY BLISS AS I AM AS I WILL ALWAYS BE AND REMAIN AS I WAS AS THE SYMBOL "ROSE" IT SAYS SO MUCH EVEN WHEN LOVE IS SO FAR AWAY WHERE WAR SEEMS TO ONLY BE AND I AM HERE IN BETWEEN FOR LOVE IS SO DENIED YET SO FELT JUST THE SAME AND REMAINS STRONG DEEP IN MY HEARTS FLAME EVEN IF SO MANY LAYERS ARE WHERE THEY ARE GUARDED SO GUARDED FOR ITS JUST WHO I AM AND ALWAYS WILL BE THE LIFE THE LIGHT AND THE ENERGY THAT IS LOVE FOR I AM HUMAN JUST LIKE ANYONE ELSE ON THIS PLANET AND HAVE A RIGHT TO BE A WOMAN TO BE BISEXUAL TO BE JUST BE LIVE AND LET LIVE.